A Heroic Struggle of Keg vs. Brain

Beer Bungie, the hallmark event of Scootouring for lo these many years, is the true test of one's devotion to the most sacred of drinks: the barley pop. You either have the spirit of the hops, or you don't. The beer bungie does not discriminate: It destroys both the strong and the weak, the big and the small, the rich and the poor, the young and the old.

Each competitor has his or her own strategy -- the running suicide charge, the steady crawl, the horizontal mountain climb -- but eventually, the bungie claims even the most cunning. That is why all must respect and fear the beer bungie.

This year's competition was stiff and went well past dark. We even had to take a break to stage the pinata smashing. By the time we were done, vertebrae were crushed, ligaments torn, and spirits destroyed. Only a stretched out tire bungie, an empty keg and a path of mangled turf was left to tell the tale.

Once all was said and done, the final round was fought between Kirsten and Dave, with Dave taking the trophy. Such a mighty battle was staged that the grandchildren of the tops shall sing songs to celebrate the valiant struggle for inebriation demonstrated that night.

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